...and go.

I want to sleep more. I would probably benefit from it. I kept waking up last night and checking Facebook. It was irritating. When at 8 this morning I finally got what I had been waiting for (sort of) I moved my one pond dog who was sleeping like a rock and took him outside. He just stared at me for a second unhappily and then scampered off to do his business. When he came back inside we tried to go back to bed. Desmond curled up next to me and had no problem. Me? Well I have no such luck.

In my frustration last night, my exhaustion, my mild hysteria-I forgot to take my medication. Someone might as well shoot me in the head now. As though my head already didn't feel like exploding. I'm rather brilliant.

I have to go feed Emmerson and Flounder. Actually I have to go clean Flounder though I'm not sure exactly how to do that correctly. That poor fish. My apartment is a disaster. I haven't been able to clean it. Or really, been alone long enough to. Not really. I need to do laundry. I need to wrap gits. My mom wants me to bake cookies. Desmond just barked at me. I should buy him stairs. He's not going to grow much more. He wants to get off my bed and to be fed too. My head is spinning. I'm not sure but I think I hear Erin yelling at me in my head. Hah.

Steubenville. Application fee. Money to send my transcripts. Three people to write me amazing letters of recommendation. That's pretty much it. Why aren't I friends with more priests?

I hate St. Anne's.

I hate that I'm 22 years old and I have more life experience and heartache than most people will have through an entire lifetime but I'm still a trapped insecure little girl that can't talk to anyone about how she really feels.

I've come so far but really, I'm still in the exact same place.

Quit it.

I'm going to go do a million things now.